I've been married for over six years now and incidentally, in love with my now-hubby for 15-plus years. Our relationship has seen plenty of ups and downs; and when you are married, it's easier to keep track of the downs. Sometimes, I feel like taking a breather and running away from the yokes of family, child and anything resembling responsibility. At others, I just want to curl into the secure confines of Abhi's arms.
I hear a lot of my friends clamouring for more space in their relationships and how-to articles in women's mags telling you how to strike the right balance between intimacy and giving each other space in a relationship. Well, yesterday I just happened to get some space.
It's about 11 at night; Abhi is blissfully asleep, even snoring a bit. I don't want to put down my book but I force myself to as I have a heavy day ahead of me. I turn off the lights and turn around. Abhi is facing away from me, lying on his side. I spoon into him and I want to hug him. I put my hand near his elbow, trying to burrow my fingers under his arm so that my arm can go all the way under his. And suddenly, Abhi just lifts up his arm to give me the space I need. The space for me to put my arm underneath his and hold on tight. I peer at him in the semi-darkness of the city night; the lights from the nearby road gives me some light. He is still fast asleep!
It felt so good within; I wanted to wake him up with a big kiss but I just held on. I know how much Abhi loves his sleep. I was just glad that my husband gave me some space of the best kind. I think every marriage needs more of this kind of space.
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Saturday, 12 September 2009
Give me some space
I've been married for over six years now and incidentally, in love with my now-hubby for 15-plus years. Our relationship has seen plenty of ups and downs; and when you are married, it's easier to keep track of the downs. Sometimes, I feel like taking a breather and running away from the yokes of family, child and anything resembling responsibility. At others, I just want to curl into the secure confines of Abhi's arms.
I hear a lot of my friends clamouring for more space in their relationships and how-to articles in women's mags telling you how to strike the right balance between intimacy and giving each other space in a relationship. Well, yesterday I just happened to get some space.
It's about 11 at night; Abhi is blissfully asleep, even snoring a bit. I don't want to put down my book but I force myself to as I have a heavy day ahead of me. I turn off the lights and turn around. Abhi is facing away from me, lying on his side. I spoon into him and I want to hug him. I put my hand near his elbow, trying to burrow my fingers under his arm so that my arm can go all the way under his. And suddenly, Abhi just lifts up his arm to give me the space I need. The space for me to put my arm underneath his and hold on tight. I peer at him in the semi-darkness of the city night; the lights from the nearby road gives me some light. He is still fast asleep!
It felt so good within; I wanted to wake him up with a big kiss but I just held on. I know how much Abhi loves his sleep. I was just glad that my husband gave me some space of the best kind. I think every marriage needs more of this kind of space.
I hear a lot of my friends clamouring for more space in their relationships and how-to articles in women's mags telling you how to strike the right balance between intimacy and giving each other space in a relationship. Well, yesterday I just happened to get some space.
It's about 11 at night; Abhi is blissfully asleep, even snoring a bit. I don't want to put down my book but I force myself to as I have a heavy day ahead of me. I turn off the lights and turn around. Abhi is facing away from me, lying on his side. I spoon into him and I want to hug him. I put my hand near his elbow, trying to burrow my fingers under his arm so that my arm can go all the way under his. And suddenly, Abhi just lifts up his arm to give me the space I need. The space for me to put my arm underneath his and hold on tight. I peer at him in the semi-darkness of the city night; the lights from the nearby road gives me some light. He is still fast asleep!
It felt so good within; I wanted to wake him up with a big kiss but I just held on. I know how much Abhi loves his sleep. I was just glad that my husband gave me some space of the best kind. I think every marriage needs more of this kind of space.
1 comment:
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Sam said...
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Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
Kahlil Gibran -
6:12 pm
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1 comment:
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
Kahlil Gibran
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