Monday, 18 January 2010

Papa don't preach, but please play

On my morning walk/jog (couldn't really jog cos my tracks kept slipping down: have I lost that much weight?), I could see kids in uniform on either side of the road in uniforms of every hue, style and length. Some were with friends, others with parents or grandparents.

As I neared my favourite stretch, I saw a father and daughter standing together but looking in opposite directions. When the bus came, the father started walking away even before the bus rolled to a stop. Without even a goodbye! There had been absolutely no eye contact between the two during the time. A little further down the road was a grandfather leaning on his cane with his granddaughter. Again, both of them had the listless look of routine!

At a bend in the road, a mother had parked her car by the roadside and was giving a tirade of sorts to her daughter, who was half-listening to her. The mother, either due to working woman guilt or supermom syndrome, was combing through all homework (I assume) one last time. On the main road, there was another mom-daughter pair hugging each other and whispering jokes in each other's ears.

Mothers, it seemed, engage better with their kids: am not saying they have great relationships with their kids but they are making an effort in a manner that they think best. But what's with the men in this New Age of parenting? Aloofness will get you nowhere... Agreed you may not be as verbose or as expressive as women, but you men can do your bit too.

My husband's favourite 'love tactic' is tickling. I absolutely hate it and we often wage war on the subject. But my little one, who is not keen on being tickled too, will occasionally go up to him and demand to be tickled. It's strange but they really connect over these mini sessions. See, all you need to do is reach out in a manner that suits you. Believe me, children are adaptable and they will understand that that's the way you love them. This doesn't translate to men saying 'But we are earning for them.' You would be earning anyway, irrespective of whether or not you have kids!

GO on guys, do some bonding. And childhood is the only time you can really enjoy your kids. Once they are all grown up, you will need those happy memories. So go and make some!

Monday, 18 January 2010

Papa don't preach, but please play

On my morning walk/jog (couldn't really jog cos my tracks kept slipping down: have I lost that much weight?), I could see kids in uniform on either side of the road in uniforms of every hue, style and length. Some were with friends, others with parents or grandparents.

As I neared my favourite stretch, I saw a father and daughter standing together but looking in opposite directions. When the bus came, the father started walking away even before the bus rolled to a stop. Without even a goodbye! There had been absolutely no eye contact between the two during the time. A little further down the road was a grandfather leaning on his cane with his granddaughter. Again, both of them had the listless look of routine!

At a bend in the road, a mother had parked her car by the roadside and was giving a tirade of sorts to her daughter, who was half-listening to her. The mother, either due to working woman guilt or supermom syndrome, was combing through all homework (I assume) one last time. On the main road, there was another mom-daughter pair hugging each other and whispering jokes in each other's ears.

Mothers, it seemed, engage better with their kids: am not saying they have great relationships with their kids but they are making an effort in a manner that they think best. But what's with the men in this New Age of parenting? Aloofness will get you nowhere... Agreed you may not be as verbose or as expressive as women, but you men can do your bit too.

My husband's favourite 'love tactic' is tickling. I absolutely hate it and we often wage war on the subject. But my little one, who is not keen on being tickled too, will occasionally go up to him and demand to be tickled. It's strange but they really connect over these mini sessions. See, all you need to do is reach out in a manner that suits you. Believe me, children are adaptable and they will understand that that's the way you love them. This doesn't translate to men saying 'But we are earning for them.' You would be earning anyway, irrespective of whether or not you have kids!

GO on guys, do some bonding. And childhood is the only time you can really enjoy your kids. Once they are all grown up, you will need those happy memories. So go and make some!